Research shows that when we focus on quantity, especially in social spaces, our brains slip into comparison. This activates threat responses in the amygdala and is linked to increased anxiety and decreased life satisfaction (Appel et al., 2020; Eisenberger, 2012; Vogel et al., 2014). When we focus on quality connection, the brain’s reward system is activated: oxytocin and dopamine are released, fueling resilience, belonging, and joy (Crocker et al., 2017; Seppala, 2016).

This ripple effect matters more than we often realize. A single act of kindness does not end with two people. It can inspire dozens of others to pay it forward. In fact, research shows that kindness is contagious. One study found that when people witness kindness in a group, they are significantly more likely to practice kindness themselves. That means your small action could change a stranger’s day, shape someone’s perspective, or even shift the culture of a workplace or family.

We sometimes underestimate how far our influence extends. Yet kindness moves outward in waves — from the moment we choose it to the unseen corners of the world it touches.

Hi, friends — it’s been a while. The quiet taught me more than I expected, and it reminded me that kindness is not a personality trait, it is a choice. In this post I share the lessons I carried from silence into light, along with simple practices that help you show up with presence, gratitude, and self-kindness. If you’ve ever needed a reminder that your light still matters, this one is for you.

It was, in retrospect, a typical workplace misunderstanding.

My boss had assumed I would do something I had done on a similar project, in a similar circumstance, and I had chosen what was best for the team and handled it differently.

Things had worked out, but she was not happy. A terse email confirmed as much, and I offered to be a better communicator in the future.

She was at my office when I came to work the next day, with her hand on her hip, checking her phone. I asked if she had seen my email, and she nodded. I asked if she felt the situation was resolved, and she did.

Who am I — really?
From hometown roots to shifting emotions, Brian Mendola explores identity in all its messy, meaningful layers. Part reflection, part invitation, this piece asks a simple question with infinite answers: Who are you?

Read more from Brian’s thoughtful journey into self and belonging.

What if we created more good drama — the kind that sparks joy, deepens connection, and reminds us to be grateful? From surprise gifts to small acts of appreciation, Chris DT Gordon invites us to flip the script on everyday emotion.

Read more on how to be positively dramatic today.

But does second place really mean you're “the first loser”? In a culture that often overlooks the runner-up, this powerful reflection challenges us to honor the heartbreak, effort, and grit it takes to come so close.

Read more on why it’s time we raise high the runner-up.

Leadership was never about the title — it was about connection. But somewhere along the way, fear replaced empathy, and caution replaced kindness. What happens when we choose to lead with hope instead?

Read more about the journey from “code purple” to compassionate leadership.

What can school leadership learn from the world of art? A lot more than you might think. Superintendent Daniel Ludvigson reflects on how his background in visual arts shaped his approach to problem-solving, sparked creativity in unexpected places, and helped him lead with curiosity, connection, and passion. From classroom interventions to districtwide innovations, he reminds us that sometimes the most powerful leadership lessons are found where no one’s looking.

Change doesn’t always come with warning signs—or a welcome mat. Whether you’re shifting jobs, wrapping up the school year, or just navigating a season that looks nothing like what you planned, one thing is true: change is hard.

In this post, I share what I’ve learned (and am still learning) about control, chaos, and choosing peace. With a mix of science, real-life stories, and encouragement, you’ll find 5 simple ways to ground yourself and keep showing up—especially when everything around you is shifting.

In my twelve years as an educator, there have been many times when I didn’t think I could keep going. I was exhausted, burnt out, with little energy to go to work. What was beating me down so much? It was difficult to pinpoint the exact stressors, but as time went on, I found that most of all, it was the unrealistic expectations I had for myself. The perfection that I was expecting of myself and everyone else around me was insurmountable. I spent so much time focusing on the things I couldn’t control that it became out of control. I spent countless hours thinking about what everyone else must be thinking of me. It got so bad that I finally went to my mom and said, “I think I have depression.” Here I was, a school counselor spending so much time helping my students, co-workers, and families manage things in their lives, and I wasn’t taking care of myself. 

These behaviors are not always symptoms of defiance. They are often signs of survival. Signs that a child is screaming, without words: I need help. Because if we know anything about our children and students, they would never (or couldn’t) come right out and say it.

As educators, mentors, coaches, youth leaders, and neighbors, we must remember:

Children are not their trauma.

They are not their outbursts.
They are not their test scores.
They are not their (temporary) behaviors.

They are full of promise. 

When we think about success, we often assume it’s the result of hard work, achievement, and reaching our goals. But what if I told you that happiness and kindness can actually be the secret ingredients for success? It sounds a little counterintuitive, right? But according to Shawn Achor in The Happiness Advantage, it’s actually happiness that fuels success, not the other way around.

I dive into the science of happiness and kindness and how we can use these simple, yet powerful tools to create environments in schools, businesses, and organizations that thrive. Let’s talk about how focusing on happiness, cultivating kindness, and shifting our mindsets can lead to better performance, stronger relationships, and a culture of success.

Gasoline, Badge, Sunglasses
What do these three things have in common? For me, they turned an ordinary travel day into a whirlwind of frustration, unexpected lessons, and a powerful reminder of how perspective can shift everything. From spilled gas and airport chaos to a bleeding thumb and a lost pair of sunglasses, this story is less about inconvenience—and more about rediscovering gratitude in the middle of the mess.

If you've ever had one of those days, this one’s for you.

Education isn’t just a job—it’s a calling. As a proud product of Oklahoma’s public schools, I’ve seen the power of connection, culture, and community to transform lives. Through Oklahoma Citizens for Education, we’re working to ensure every student feels seen, every teacher is supported, and every school is empowered to thrive. This is more than advocacy—it’s about building belonging.

School culture isn’t just about pep rallies, spirit weeks, or assemblies. Sure, those things are great, but the real foundation of a strong school culture is built in the tiny, everyday moments—the ones that often go unnoticed but leave a lasting impact.  It’s the simple things, that aren’t little things, that can build or break school culture.  

Think about it: A teacher greeting students by name as they walk in. A student picking up a dropped book for a classmate. A principal pausing to ask how a student’s soccer game went. A lunchroom worker sharing a smile while handing out trays. These simple things, that aren’t little things, shape the way students and staff feel about their school—whether it’s a place where they belong, where they’re valued, and where they want to be.

So, how can we be more intentional about creating a positive school culture through these simple things? Here are a few simple moments, that aren’t little moments, that build school culture.  The best part?  They don’t cost any money, and just a little bit of time!

What happens when life takes an unexpected—and nearly fatal—turn? Chris DT Gordon knows firsthand. After a simple scratch led to a life-threatening battle with necrotizing fasciitis, he faced unimaginable physical and emotional challenges. But through it all, he discovered something profound: the transformative power of gratitude.

In this inspiring guest blog, Chris shares his journey from uncertainty and fear to resilience and purpose through his Attitude of Gratitude (TAG) framework. His story is a powerful reminder that while we can't always control what happens to us, we can choose how we respond.

Education stands at the threshold of a new era—one filled with limitless possibilities for growth, innovation, and student success. By embracing forward-thinking approaches, we can create learning environments that energize educators, engage students, and cultivate academic and personal achievement. The POSITIVE Framework is more than just a strategy; it is the key to unlocking the full potential of our schools. This transformative approach empowers educators, enriches teaching, and ensures that every student thrives. The future of education is bright, and with the right tools, we can make it extraordinary! 

The change of seasons often brings with it a renewed sense of hope and energy. There’s something about stepping outside and feeling the warmth on your skin, hearing the birds chirping, and seeing new life spring up all around you. It’s a reminder that no matter how long and cold the winter may seem, there’s always the promise of brighter days ahead. Just like the seasons, our lives have their own ebbs and flows. When we embrace the natural rhythm of life, we can find comfort in knowing that tough times are temporary, and joy is always within reach.

Research supports the idea that spending time outside can significantly boost our mental health. A study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that spending just 20 minutes in a natural setting can reduce stress hormone levels (Hunter et al., 2019). Additionally, exposure to natural light is associated with improved mood and cognitive function (Berman et al., 2012).

I remember working in a school district and burning the candle at both ends. I thought that putting in more hours, achieving more accomplishments, and gaining more recognition would catapult me into the next opportunity. However, those false narratives significantly impacted my well-being. Over time, I realized the power of movement—walking, riding my bike, or simply being outside. Research supports this: walking for just 20 minutes at any pace can help reduce anxiety, tension, and even headaches (Harding, 2019).

Emotional development in childhood is a multifaceted process that influences a child’s ability to thrive academically and socially. For today's Gen Z and Gen Alpha students, who value connection, belonging, and kindness, educational environments must adapt to meet these needs. By integrating strategies that promote emotional regulation, empathy, and a sense of community, educators can cultivate classrooms where every child feels seen, valued, and supported. Ultimately, teaching kindness and fostering belonging are not just educational strategies but essential elements of preparing children for a successful and fulfilling future.